April 17th was the last time I had self medicated. That means yesterday marked the four month period of staying strong and getting help. I remember that night like it was just last night because that night was different from any other time i had self medicated. When i began to swallow the pills i was hoping i would get away from my pain and if i am being truthful i was hoping that i would never wake up again. By the grace of God I woke up the next morning he gave me a second chance at life, he gave me mercy and love when i least deserved it. I would be lying if i said that i didn't have extreme urges to self medicate again but there is this saying that i constantly think of; "Be strong because things get better. It may be stormy now but it never rains forever." No matter what storm i am facing or temptation i am overcoming i can get through and have done it before.  So for any of you that are struggling or for me next time i read this, stay strong. I believe in you and your strength. Do not believe that being strong means you have to bottle up your emotions because that doesnt help you, being strong means knowing when you are weak but holding your head up and asking for help. As humans we are not made to go through life alone we crave companionship so try letting someone in to listen and help you. I believe in you!

                                                                                       Stay strong lovies!